Wednesday, November 24, 2010

Best Night

Our worst night was followed by our best night!!!  Max did a 4 hour and a 3 hour stretch last night!  Unbelievable!  It feels soooooo good to have gotten some sleep!  And I am so happy to know that he CAN do longer stretches!

Right now both babies are sleeping.  My mom is off today so once they wake up, we're going to head to her house. 

I'm excited for Thanksgiving tomorrow!  We have so much to be thankful for. 

Oh- get this... so I talked to a Lactation consultant yesterday about Max's nursing strike.  She blamed it on the barometric pressure changes from the storm coming in tonight (two nights after his strike).  Weird?!?!  I don't buy it.  She said she's almost certain it's not from the pacifier. 

Tuesday, November 23, 2010

Tough night

Last night was a tough night.  In fact, it might be have my toughest night yet as a mom.  Max decided to stop eating.  The little boy that already is getting a chunky tummy because he eats all the time just up and decided to stop!  He didn't eat from 6PM yesterday evening until 5AM this morning.  He was up screaming for most of the night.  He was rooting and acting very hungry, as I'm sure he was, but he just wouldn't eat- he'd only scream.  Finally at 4AM I handed him off to Josh (who returned to work today), found my pump, and pumped for my first time since last spring.  And at 5AM I broke down sobbing.   To want to nurse your starving, screaming baby, and not be able to, and have no idea why, is just a horrible, horrible feeling.   I caved, found a new bottle, boiled a pot of water to sanitize the nipple, warmed up my expressed milk, and fed him a bottle.  He took the bottle immediately. It obviously wasn't my milk that was the problem because he drank the same milk from the bottle.  At 7AM today I tried nursing again, and again he refused, so I gave him another bottle.  Annie came and got Claire for me because I was simply exhausted, emotionally and physically, and needed to be able to focus on getting feeding back on track today.  I tried again at 9AM and he nursed!!!  I was so happy!  He has been sleeping since then so I'm crossing my fingers he'll wake up soon and nurse again. 

The only reason I can think of for his nursing strike is the pacifier we introduced a couple days ago.  He's been an excellent nurser from day 1, so this is the only thing I can think of that would have made a difference.  He really loves the paci and it helps him calm down and sleep, both during the day and at night, so it's a shame to take it away, but if it means getting nursing back on track, then I'll gladly do it. 

Two positives to be thankful for is that Claire didn't wake up once during all of Max's screaming last night and she slept until 7:20 this morning, when she has been getting up around 5:30AM! 

Today is Josh's first day back at work and we're really missing him.  I'm glad it's a short week.  And I'm so thankful for the three weeks that we had together.

Saturday, November 20, 2010

Blessings

We've had a lot of unexpected expenses lately.  They aren't coming at a good time (is it ever a good time to have unexpected expenses?!) since we have to pay for a labor and delivery (not cheap at all, even with decent insurance) and we have less income due to Josh's 3 week unpaid leave and my 6 week unpaid leave.

First we had to pay $1200 for Josh's treatments for his headaches (I would pay thousands and thousands of dollars for Josh to fix his headaches so this is money well spent... especially if it works).  Then my Rav4 needed work (new tires and brakes/roters), which cost $1000.  Then Josh had to have a root canal, a week after Max was born, which cost $460.  Then we discovered that our hot water heater was leaking.  After some research, Josh learned that a water heater must be replaced once it starts leaking and should be replaced asap as it could easily cause a flood.  After already enduring 3 basement floods in three years, we knew we wanted to avoid that!!  So last Sunday Josh went to Sears to buy a new water heater.  While there, he called Brad (my mom's significant other) to get his advice on the type of heater to get.  Brad told Josh that just two days prior, he had been given a brand new water heater from a customer that owed him for some work that Brad had done.  Brad wanted to bless us by giving us this water heater, at no charge, even though he could have easily sold it on Craigslist for $400+. 

Wow. What a 'coincidence'.  What a blessing indeed.  Josh picked it up a couple days later from this gentleman's house in Minneapolis and last night our brother-in-law, Sean, kindly helped us install the heater.  Josh had also bought about $120 worth of supplies for the installation at Home Depot, which we can return almost all of because Sean had spare parts for us to use.  So we saved on the heater, the parts, and the installation, because of Sean's help.  Thank you, Jesus, for taking care of us! And thank you Brad for being His hands and feet!

Saturday morning random thoughts

It's Saturday morning.  Josh is at Home Depot.  Claire and Max are napping. And I just took a shower.  We finally got some sleep last night.  Max got 3 approx two hour stretches.  We discovered that he must have his arms swaddled.  The problem is that he hates to have his arms swaddled so he has to be in a very deep sleep before we lay him in the bassinnet.  There were several times that I fed him, got him to sleep, and laid him down, only to have him wake up a few minutes later fighting with his blanket.  It was Josh who got him into the deep enough sleep each time last night.  Lots of standing, shh-ing, swaying, etc.  I wonder if he will get used to having his arms swaddled or if we'll need to continue getting him into the deep sleep.  Hmm..

We tried the pacifier for the first time yesterday and I was amazed at how quickly he got the hang of it.  Claire wasn't sure what to think and kept pointing at it and saying "pas".  He's been fussier lately.  My dream baby that never cried unless he was hungry or wanting to be held was just a dream it seems. :)  He is still nowhere near the fussy level that Claire achieved, but he's getting trickier. 

I can't believe that Josh's three week leave of absence is coming to an end.  Only one more day off!  It went so, so quickly, but was such a blessing to our family.  The time with him has been really special.  Claire sure will miss him; they are great buddies.  I'm glad next week is a short week. 

I had forgotten how 'trapped' (for a lack of a better word) you feel as a nursing mom the first several (maybe 6?) weeks.  Max's eating schedule is very unpredictable, which makes going anywhere or doing anything difficult.  Soon enough he'll be on a better schedule but for now we're just nursing on demand. 

Well Max is waking up so I best go tend to him.  Have a wonderful Saturday!

Wednesday, November 17, 2010

Sydney Update

Our family feels very different these days.  Insead of Josh, Whitney, Claire and Sydney, it's Josh, Whitney, Claire and Max.  I miss Sydney dearly.  Not a day goes by that I don't think of her.   Sometimes the memories make me smile and remember her fondly.  Other times they make me sad.   

We have received two updates.  She is doing absolutely wonderfully with her new family. They just adore her.  In the last update, Dave said, "I cannot thank you enough for how happy you have made my parents".  This situation really is a blessing.  We are so happy we found the perfect home for Sydney and that she is making a family very happy.  They bring her on walks 2-3 times a day and she frequently enjoys golf cart rides with the mom (probably less so now with the snow!).  Their 7 year old granddaughter lives just down the street and she comes to visit Sydney daily.  Shockingly, Sydney is getting along very well with their cat too!  And Dave said she loves to cuddle every night with his dad.  It just warms my heart to think about her with this new family, but it also creates a lump in my throat at the same time.  Sydney really is an amazing dog!

Monday, November 15, 2010

Sleepless in Savage

This is only a phase....
Please go to sleep, Max.
Dear Lord, please help Max sleep so we can all sleep.
This is only a phase....
I can do this... I can do this...
I love you, Max
It's only a phase..


If you ever wondered what it's like to be in my head, there you go.  Those are the thoughts that go through my mind all night long when I'm not sleeping.  Max's sleeping (or lack thereof) at night is getting worse and worse with each passing day.  Last night he got one 3 hour stretch (for which I was very, very thankful) but didn't sleep for more than 45 minutes at a time beyond that.  There'll be times that he is awake for an hour or two at a time and then times he'll fall asleep, only to wake up 20 minutes later to start the cycle all over again.  He sleeps really well in my arms but within minutes of laying him in the basinnet, he's awake.  And crying.  And hungry.  Except I don't really think he's hungry because he just ate 5 times in the previous 2 hours and my milk supply is well established so I know he's getting enough milk.  And to complicate matters, when he cries, Claire wakes up and cries, so I desperately try to keep him quiet. 

What does he have against the basinnet?!?!?!

I can't sit up and hold him all night long.  We've tried swaddled.  No swaddle.  Hat on.  Hat off.  Fleece blanket.  Cotton blanket.  Holding him (while he's sleeping) upright on my shoulder for 20 minutes before laying him down to let him burp and get gas out.  Laying him down right from eating without burping.  He's not terribly upset or uncomfortable.  He just wants to be held while he sleeps.  That's not too much to ask, right Mama??? 

Sigh......

Getting 3 hours of sleep is not going to be sustainable for me, particularly when Josh goes back to work and I need to take care of two babies all day. 

The perplexing thing is that he sleeps like a charm during the day.  On his back.  Without being held.  So why not at night???????

Saturday, November 13, 2010

How it's been

It's been almost two weeks since Max entered our world, on the outside.  While both Claire and Max are napping (oh these are cherished times!!) I thought I would write a quick update.

So far, it's gone really well, considering.  It's been SO SO wonderful to have all four of us at home.  I really wish Josh could be home my entire maternity leave but bills need to be paid so he'll be returning to work on the 23rd.  It's been so special to have this time with him.  He is an amazing father and husband.  I don't know if we've ever spent this much time together! 

Max is a terrific baby.  He's very chill, unlike how his big sister was as a baby!  By this point, Claire was already screaming for multiple hours a day and it was exhausting and overhwhelming.  Max, on the other hand, typically only cries when he's hungry or wants to be held.  Thankfully his woes can be cured by feeding or cuddling.  He continues to be an amazing nurser. I am so pleased with how both my body and Max are doing in the nursing department.  It's just a night and day difference from last time.  Claire was also a good nurser and I was fortunate to not have many issues at all, but the first 6 weeks or so can be tough in terms of pain, discomfort, and just your body regulating its supply and demand.  But not this time!  My body is acting like it never stopped nursing last April when Claire was weaned.  It's truly a gift to not have to struggle in this department at all.   That said, he wants to eat ALL THE TIME.  He probably nurses every 30 minutes-3 hours, depending on whether he's sleeping.  But I'll take a nursing baby over a screaming baby any day.

At Max's 2 week check-up (which was on his 11th day of life, so a bit early), he weighed 7 lbs 4 oz and was 20 inches long.  The length confuses me because he was 19 inches in the hospital. I told this to the nurse so she re-measured him and we saw he is in fact 20 inches.  But I also saw them measure Max in the hospital and they were also very precise in arrving at the 19 inches.  Could he really have grown an entire inch in 11 days?!?!   He's in the 25th percentile all around.  His 2 week check-up was held on his actual due date so he would have been bigger had he been born on time.

Claire is doing well as a big sister.  She's enjoying having both Mommy and Daddy at home.  She's been very whiny lately and it can drive us crazy.  I'm hoping I can attribute it to teething, not feeling well (she had a stomach bug and was constipated this week) or adapting to having a baby brother at home.

Speaking of sickness, we all had it this past week.  First Claire, then me, and then Josh.  Not fun!  It is miserable to take care of a newborn all night with a 101.5 degree fever.  I was so weak that it was difficult to hold his little 7 lb body.  My main concern though was Max.  I was up almost the entire night on Monday and spent hours praying for his protection and safety.  Praise the Lord that he didn't get sick!!  Fortunately we are all better now.  Except for Claire, who is still dealing with constipation- poor girl.  You never know how blessed you are to have good health until it's taken away!

Well Sarah and Erik are on their way down for a visit and to meet Max (they are braving our first big snowstorm- he must be pretty special!).  It's been so fun to have our friends and family meet our newest addition.  They all seem to think he's pretty adorable-- and they love his hair! 

Friday, November 5, 2010

Introducing Maxwell Christopher!





We're so excited that our son, Max, is finally here!  Before I forget any details, I want to get my birth story down, like I did with Claire's here.  Warning- this is going to be long and could be considered graphic to some. :)  Josh took notes throughout the labor so I could accurately remember the details!

Sunday was Halloween and we thoroughly enjoyed the holiday with our little cow, Claire.  She had SO much fun!  I got some decent sleep that night and got ready for work in the morning.  While getting ready for work, I noticed that I was feeling my contractions in my back, whereas I normally only feel them in my stomach.  I thought that perhaps it could be the start of labor, but I didn't feel strongly enough to pack my suitcase or any gear in my car.  I had decided to work downtown as much as possible since my office in Brooklyn Park is an hour from the hospital.  As I sat on the ramp to enter 35W, I noticed that the contractions were coming pretty regularly and continued to cause pain in my back, so I downloaded a handy Contraction Timer app on my iPhone (the iPhone came in clutch, once again!).  I started timing my contractions while I talked to my mom on the phone.    I didn't mention anything to her because I didn't want to unnecessarily cause anxiety or excitement. 

As I approached downtown, I had a fairly strong feeling that this was labor.  The contractions were every 5 minutes, lasted about 1 minute, and were uncomfortable.  So I called Josh and told him I thought I could be starting labor and that if so, I could pick him up and he could drive me to the hospital.  When I got downtown, I called him and said we better go in, so he met me in the parking garage and we headed back south.  I called my on-call doctor, who happened to be my primary doctor, Dr Song, and she said I could go to the hospital, but if it wasn't real labor, I would have to go home.  I was torn because I didn't know for sure that it was actually labor but Josh reminded me it's better to go in and know for sure than it is to have a baby in a car. 

We got to the hospital, changed into the gown, got settled, and talked to admitting.  At 9:35AM, my nurse, Macy, checked me and said I was 4-5CM.  Based on the dilation and on the contractions that the monitor was measuring, she confirmed that yes, I was in labor!!  Yay, we were going to have a baby!!! 

We called Chris so he could pick up some stuff at our house and bring it to the hospital (camera, camcorder, suitcase, etc).  I called my mom and she was So excited that she decided to leave work right away. We couldn't reach Annie on her phone so she was surprised to find out when Chris stopped by to pick up the stuff. 

Because I had tested positive for group B strep (GBS) at a previous appt (which about half of women do), I had to start antibiotics (penicillin).  With Claire, one of the worst parts was the IV in my arm because they had much difficulty and it caused my arm to swell and bruise, so I was nervous about getting the IV this time.  At 10AM a different nurse, Lacy, tried doing the IV twice unsuccesfully (in my left and then right hands) before giving up.  Macy put hot packs on my arms and then tried again, successfully, at 10:15AM.   At 10:25AM, the antibiotic was started.  I had to have the antibiotic for a minimum of 4 hours before Max could be born (this exact time, 10:25 will be critical later in the story :)). 

At 10:40AM, Chris arrived with our stuff. 

At 10:55AM, Dr Lee, the anesthesiologist, gave me the epidural.  I was torn on when I should get it.  I was in pain but it wasn't too bad.  The pain was much, much less than what I experienced with Claire when I was on the wretched Pitocin.  My contractions were only every 4-5 minutes (versus 1-2 minutes with Claire) so that made them much more manageable.  I had decided to hold off on the epidural for awhile, but then Macy said that Dr Lee was next door giving another woman an epi so it was a good time if I was okay with doing it then.  I decided why wait, so we went ahead with it.  I explained to him that it didn't appear to have worked last time because the pain actually increased on my right side with my first epi.  He didn't offer an explanation and just said that this one should work.  Super. 

The epi did work (hooray) and I almost instantly could not feel the contractions any longer.   When I got the epi, I was still at 5cm.  Dr. Regina Cho was the doctor that would be delivering for me that day. She wanted to break my water to get things rolling but wanted to wait awhile to give me more time with the antibiotic. 

At 12:20PM, she decided it was safe to break my water.  Looking back, we all wish she had waited longer, because my body progressed extremely fast after that point. 

At 1:00PM Macy checked my progress and found I was already 8cm.  I had predicted I would be at least 7cm and Josh thought there was no way it would change that much so quickly.  I told Macy I thought I would be at 10cm very soon.  Cue the anxiety on all of our parts because it was really important that I didn't deliver until after 2:25 (which was 4 hours after the antibiotic was started). 

At 1:30 I wanted Macy to check me again because I felt strongly that I was already 10cm.  I was feeling intense pressure and was in pain with every contraction.  While I was breathing and focusing through the contractions, Josh was playing "a super fun new game that I should check out" called Angry Birds on his iPhone.  Macy didn't want to check me because she was nervous that I would be 10cm, and there would be nothing we could do about it because it was too soon to start pushing.

Finally at 1:50 Macy checked, and confirmed, yes, I was in fact 10cm.  She started the second bag of antibiotics (usually women have at least 2, if not 3-4 bags of the antibiotics before delivering. The second bag typically starts after the first bag is finished at the 4 hour mark, but she knew we wouldn't have time so she started it early).  The antibiotic makes your arm burn but I didn't notice the burning with the second bag because of the intense pressure I felt during the contractions. 

At 2:00PM, Macy came back in the room and said we needed 20 more minutes for the antibiotics and to NOT PUSH!  Let me tell you this- not pushing when you are 10cm and all your entire body wants to do is push out the baby is the most unnatural and uncomfortable feeling you can imagine.  But I was focused on doing what I had to do for the health of my baby, and I was determined to not deliver before 2:25.  For the first time that day, I started music on my iPod and focused intently on the praise and worship songs resonating throughout the room (I didn't bother with earphones).  It took all of my concentration to keep my baby INSIDE me during each contraction. 

Finally, it was the magical time of 2:25 and I started pushing.  I felt like there was an entourage in the room because it was Dr. Cho, Macy, a person to keep record of time, a nursing student, and Josh.  During the pushing I felt a lot of pressure,  but not pain per se.  Dr. Cho said multiple times that I was "above average" in the pushing department.  Maybe I am, because it only took 25 minutes of pushing for him to be born!  For some reason, it felt a lot longer than 25 minutes.  I had a tear and a 2nd degree episiotomy. 

When Max was born, he came out screaming!!  He peed immediately after he was laid on my stomach and it squirted in the air.  I remember feeling exhilirated, overwhelmed, joyful, and hearing the nurses proclaim that "his head is huge!" and other comments on how loud he was screaming and how cute he was. 

I was so pleased with my medical team.  Macy was simply amazing.  I feel so blessed to have had her.  She is a casual nurse so she only works 2 or so shifts a week.  That day was her day off but they had called her in because someone else had called in sick.  Dr. Cho was also wonderful.  Interestingly, she was the only doctor that I hoped wouldn't be delivering for me because my only experience with her previously was during my pregnancy with Claire and it didn't go so well.  But she was great!  Very calm, friendly, attentive, all the important stuff.  She also said that my body was made to carry and deliver babies.  Imagine that with my petite 5'1'', 100 pound frame. 

After they stitched and cleaned me up, I ordered food because I hadn't eaten since 8:30AM (I scarfed a banana down as we pulled into the hospital parking lot).  I ordered spaghetti, side salad, coke (for some sugar) and chocolate ice cream.  The nurses tried helping me to the restroom but as I sat there I became extremely light headed- my vision became blurry, I got the cold sweats, and I felt like I was going to faint.  So they helped me back into bed and I felt much better after I ate my meal. 

Max has done simply wonderfully with nursing from the start.  It honestly could not be going any better or be any easier (relatively speaking... as nursing, especially a newborn, is a feat). 

It was fun for Claire to come to the hospital that evening and meet Max.  She said "babies" and "shhhh" because he was sleeping.  She clung to Nana and I think she was just overall a bit confused. 

Our stay at the hospital was great.  We had many different nurses throughout our time there and we enjoyed them all.  It was so nice to have Max in our room and not in the NICU, like Claire was.  We got very little sleep the first night- maybe 2 hours or so- because of all of the feedings for Max and having my and his vitals checked every 4 hours (which of course never coincided with each other or the feedings).  Josh has been terrific and I would expect no less.  He is such a tremendous father and partner for me (when he's not playing Angry Birds :)). 

Today is day 5 of Max's life and we are adjusting to being a family of 4.  It will really help all of us to have Josh home from work for three weeks.  Claire has been a dream and is taking the adjustment very well.  The first night home she woke up crying once when Max was up screaming, but that has been it.  Last night she slept from 7PM until 8:10AM this morning.  We're paying lots of attention to her, which isn't difficult since all Max has done is sleep, eat, poop, and pee!

I'm pretty sure Josh and I should continue this baby train because a) we make darn cute babies and b) apparently my body is made for this.  What do you think???

Well my firstborn just woke up from her nap so I better go and get her.  If anyone made it through this entire story, I will be amazed. :)  It's great to have these details documented for us to reflect upon later!