A touching moment between Daddy and Daughter

Josh's first conversation with Claire this morning after she got up at 8:15 (!!!):

"Claire, you are so cute. I love you SO, SO, SO much!!! If only Mommy or I were Asian, you would be even cuter!".

January 29th

Two years ago today

We lost our first baby

This shell was his/her first present.

I remember the day so vividly

My heart was so broken

I cried and cried until I was exhausted and passed out.

I felt empty and fearful

I worried we would never experience the birth of a child

And yet, I praised Him

I am thankful for the lows in life

They teach us how to fall to our knees

How to be humbled

And how to trust

I am forever grateful for our first baby and they will never be forgotten.

You give and take away

You give and take away

My heart with choose to say

Lord, blessed be Your name.

Claire at 9 months

She's been OUT as long as she was IN!!! Her little life began 18 months ago!! I can't believe we need to soon start thinking about her first birthday party!

Claire at 9 months:

• Is totally a little person. Her temperament is really making itself known. She is a very sensitive little girl. It even seems like her feelings can get hurt. At her 9 month doctor appointment today I asked her baby doctor if it's possble for her feelings to get hurt. Dr. Hansen said, "you know, in all my years of doing this, I have never been asked that question". GREAT. I'm one of the least paranoid moms and yet I ask a question that my very experienced doctor has never heard! She said it's unlikely her feelings could have been hurt, in the sense that she felt she was 'bullied'. However, she could be really sensitive to noises, reactions, separation, etc.
• can do "SO BIG"! It's so adorable! She won't always do it on command, which makes it that much more exciting when she does it! You say, "Claire, how big are you???" and she smiles and puts her arms in the air.
• Waves hi
• Can pick up her food with her thumb and forefinger (the 'pincher' hold, they call it).
• Is not so great at eating solid foods, other than purees. I tried giving her scrambled eggs a couple weekends ago and I thought she was swallowing it just fine. Little did I know she was actually storing the eggs in her mouth and masking them behind her mammoth cheeks! She finally couldn't store anymore and started gagging on it so I reached my hand into her mouth and frantically pulled them out.
• LOVES to snack. She could eat her puffs and yogurt melts all day long.
• weighs 15 lbs 1 oz (3rd percentile) and is 26 inches long (1oth percentile). Her head is 17 inches (25% percentile).
• Wears many different sizes, based on the brand. She wears Circo 3-6 month onesies, Gap and Gymboree 6-12 month clothing, Carter's 9 month sleepers (which are really too long, but the 6 month were too short).
• Is a good eater. She has tried lots of different, homemade food, and has only shown an aversion to a couple. Here is what she has had, with the rating of how much I think she likes them (from 1-10, 1 being "ugh! Mom! This is like you eating CHEESE!" and 10 being "Mom, this is like how much you love brownies and ice cream!"):

Applesauce: 7
Pears: 8
Bananas: 6
Apples with Strawberries: 7
Apricots: 6
Blueberries: 6
Sweet Potatoes: 9
Squash: 9
Carrots: 8
Peas: 7
Corn: 4
Broccoli: 3
Chicken with veggies: 2
Beef with veggies: 3
Cheese with veggies: 5
Yogurt: 10!!!!!
Peaches: 7
Ice cream (just a tiny bit): 10!!!!

• She definitely has her mama's and grandma's and great-grandpa Rudy's sweet tooth. Poor thing never had a chance. Tonight I was eating ice cream and she was literally attacking me. She was trying to climb up me (I was sitting on the floor) and grunting and slightly shaking. Her doctor said we need to try to teach her how to eat different textures so that's our new challenge. We'll see in her next monthly status how succcessful we have been!
• Continues to take a good 3 naps a day. Naps are finally a routine and not a struggle! It makes SUCH a big difference when she sleeps well (at night and during the day) and we don't have to fight her on it. Our weekends are that much more enjoyable without this struggle! She's pretty good at being laid down drowsy but awake and falling asleep on her own. She still typically gets up 1 time per night. Sometimes it's twice and sometimes she actually sleeps through the night. Starting last weekend, we are trying to not feed her during the night. She's plenty old enough to not need a night feeding. Since she does get nursed at night, she has become accustomed to it and loves her time at 2AM snuggling with mommy. I must admit I like it myself but I certainly wouldn't complain about getting a full night's sleep! So far the night feeding boycott is going well. I have only backed down one night since we started last Friday. She still wakes up but she can either fuss herself back to sleep or one of us goes in there, changes her diaper (she hates having a wet diaper, which doesn't bode well for any of us overnight!), and lays her back down. It's so nice that without feeding her at night, Josh can get up by himself and I can stay in bed!
• Still nurses 3 times per day during the week and about 6-7 times per day on the weekend. During the week, she usually also has 2 bottles of breastmilk and 1 bottle of formula. She eats solids 3 times per day (usually 3-4 ice cubes of food).
• I asked Josh what else I should document about her personality and he responded, "She's stubborn". She IS stubborn! Bless her heart. She's quite strong-willed! She's also "tricky". Last night I added the bumper to her crib because she often wedges herself against the side and I thought it would be more comfy to lay against a nice cushion than a hard wooden bar. I wanted to test it out so I put her in the crib (and she looked at me with very questioning eyes demanding why I put her in there when it was not nap or bedtime!). I saw the possibility of using the bumper to 'climb' up the side of the crib and catapault herself out. So we lowered it to the very bottom! She looks so tiny with the crib all the way lowered. But now we can rest assured that she won't pull any crazy stunts!
• Still loves her paci. We're limiting the use. She gets it at night, during some naps, and sometimes in her carseat. Once we have the night-time feedings completely eliminated, we're tackle taking away the paci.
• Has two teeth! The bottom two. I think her top two will arrive in the next month.
• Climbs the stairs quite quickly.
• Turns the pages when we read her books, in the correct direction.

Haiti, part 2

Thanks for your comments! We donated $5 x 5 comments (sorry Mel- only counted you once!) = $25 to HOPE International.

I heard today that a teenager was just rescued from under the rubble after FOURTEEN days. She was severly dehydrated, starving, and injured, but she was treated in one of the military ships and is doing much better! Praise GOD! He is truly working miracles.

This tragedy is a prime reason why I do not believe that everything happens for a reason. I think that good things are coming out of this horrific tragedy. And good things will continue to happen as the country is rebuilt over the next many years. But I personally do not believe that God had a reason and thus created this earthquake with the intent that 200,000 people would die. Maybe He did. But maybe He didn't. If I lived in Haiti and Claire died in the earthquake, I would unleash the wrath of Mama Whitney on anyone that told me that she died in this earthquake "for a reason".

We need to keep loving on the Haitians!

Haiti

My heart aches for Haiti. Josh and I took a mission trip to the Dominican Republic, which borders Haiti, in March 2008 and witnessed first hand the poverty that rampages the country. We were told that Haiti is even worse.

70% of the Haitians live on less than $2.15 per day.

Think about that.

You and I spend $2.15 without even batting an eye. Forget about our daily expenses for our mortgage, car payments, etc. Just consider the daily coffee, or the snack, or the box of brownie mix that we pick up at Target. I can't even comprehend the majority of citizens living on less than $785/year.

We can help. Josh and I plan on donating money to HOPE International (www.hopeinternational.org). It's a fantastic organization that truly gets at the root of the issues that cause poverty-- teaching men how to fish, instead of giving them fish. They have a huge presence in Haiti and will help these precious brothers and sisters in Christ get back on their feet.

In addition to that donation, we will donate $5 for every comment left on my blog between now and Saturday at 9AM.

So, show us the love, people.

Things I don't want to forget

I am in love with Claire's hands. I love all of her adorable body parts, but I am particularly fond of her hands. I don't know what it is. Maybe it's because they are so teeny tiny and the way she can maneuver and manipulate them fascinates me. She has always had good control of her hands. When she had her 2 week check-up, her doctor commented that she was (pleasantly) surprised to see her hands streched open because most babies have their hands clenched in a fist for quite some time still. For a long time, she has opened and closed her hands. I feel them on my side when I feed her. Now it appears that she uses this motion to communicate "hi". It's so cute! I have been skeptical for a while but I really think she waved hi to me twice this past Thursday.

I also love the noises she makes. The four noises she makes most often are (this is my attempt at a phonetic description):
1). Ah tiiii
2) Ah boeufff
3) Oeuffff
4) a noise that sounds like she's whistling with her mouth not in a circle shape

While she's upstairs sleeping soundly in her comfortable crib, with a full tummy, and a freshly washed body, my mind and heart wander to the babies and children in Haiti that are injured, dying, hungry, homeless. Please, Lord, protect Your children. You know every name and every need. These are Your babies. Reveal yourself to all who are hurting. Provide a way for resources and help to reach these desperate people. And be glorified.

How to Lose Weight After A Baby

Several people have told me that I should write a book on how to lose weight after you have a baby. I chuckle and say thank you and shrug. I don't want to come across as the annoying little brat that ate everything she wanted and didn't work out and lost all the baby fat, because, well, that was a possibility.

I gained 23 pounds with Claire. I have lost 32 since she was born.


If I wrote the book, there would be four chapters:

Chapter 1: Be blessed with a ridiculously good metabolism. A metabolism that hasn't slowed down despiste being 28 years old.


Chapter 2: Walk. Especially around malls.

Chapter 3: Eat whatever you want, including dessert at least once per day.

Chapter 4: Breastfeed. I think this is really what has done it for me, although the steps in chapters 1-3 certainly contributed. If for no other reason, I think all new moms should attempt to breastfeed simply for the phenomenal amount of calories it burns!

So there's my book.

How does it happen so quickly?!

How does she go from this tiny little newborn...

...to this standing, crawling, stair climbing, full of personality baby teetering on toddlerdom in just 7 months?!

She's growing up too quickly!!!
And as I look through the pictures from 3 weeks old and 8 months old, my heart wants to burst out of my chest with love for her! I make it sound like it's always easy and rosy and the truth is that it's not. It's hard. It's more work than we've ever experienced. But every ounce of pain, struggle, sleeplessness, and worry is worth it. I wish we could have 10 more! :)