He won

When you become a Manager, you can read books and take classes but you really can't learn how to handle situations like navigating conflict, dealing with poor performance, or influencing, without actually experiencing them.

I've been managing people for seven years and yesterday I experienced a new situation for the first time, and God willing, the last.

Yesterday, I had to tell my team that their colleague, Maria, passed away on Tuesday. And it was awful.

I wrote this post back in January about sweet Maria.

I emailed with Maria less than two weeks ago (she went on long-term disability on June 29th) and now she is gone.

When I learned of her death as soon as I walked into my office on Wednesday, I almost ran into a nearby 'quiet room' before my team could see me (as they did not yet know), where I called my mom, broke down and sobbed.

Wiped the tears, pulled my team together, and shared the tragic news.

A colleague of Maria's said, "She won. He won.  She is healed".

Before Maria left in January for her leave of absence she said, "Worst case scenario, I get to go home to my Savior, and that's pretty amazing".

Maria radiated joy, hope, and optimism.  She never stopped believing that she could be healed, this side of Heaven.  And I joined many, many others in continuing to pray for it.  I drive right past her house when I go to my mom's or to church and say a prayer for her every time.  Now, when I drive past I will pray for her husband and daughter.

Cancer is a beast.  I feel like it's everywhere and it terrifies me more than anything else in the world.  Three months ago another member on my team lost his father to cancer.  Two weeks ago my former boss lost her father to cancer (at age 60).  Tuesday we lost Maria to breast cancer.

There will be a large group from Target attending Maria's funeral next Thursday.  Another first experience as a Manager for me.

Dear Cancer, you suck.  But you know what?  You didn't get the victory.  Jesus won and Maria is healed.  Thank you, Jesus.  We miss and love you, sweet sweet Maria..

And on that day when my strength is failing

the end draws near and my time has come

Still my soul will sing Your praise unending

Ten thousand years and then forevermore. 

Matt Redman. 10,000 Reasons (Bless the Lord)